On Matrimony: the Catholic Doctrine

Author: Padre Alejandro Cortés González-Báez  

 

 

Nowadays, not infrequently, we hear in the communications media all sorts of negative opinions about the institution of marriage. Often it is depicted as a mechanism for the subjugation of women. In the legal realm, it has become less difficult each day to be granted a divorce, less difficult to dissolve a marriage.
The image of matrimony as an institution is devalued and becoming more devalued. And not because of intrinsic weaknesses but rather what might appear to be an orchestrated global effort. Well, as expected, the bill to be paid for this deterioration is logically very expensive for society. The personal failure of divorce affects the children and eventually the fabric of the nation.
In contrast to this cheapened version we find a more positive alternative proposed by the Church. Let us be clear, more positive does not mean “perfect” or “more comfortable” or “without problems” but rather more valuable.
Here is an example taken from the encyclical Humanae Vitae of His Holiness Paul VI: Matrimony, therefore, is not an effect of chance or coincidence or a product of the evolution of unconscious natural forces, it is a sensible institution of the Creator to make real his plan for love in humanity. Husband and wife, through the personal and reciprocal giving of themselves, exclusively, move towards communion of their beings, with the goal of a mutual personal improvement in their closeness to God by creating and educating new lives.
It is clearly a love uniquely human, which is to say, feeling and spiritual at the same time. It is therefore not only a simple outpouring of instinct and feeling it is also an act of free will intent in maintaining itself and growing during the happy times and painful times of our daily lives.
It is a complete love, a very unique form of personal friendship, with which the spouses share everything generously, without undue reservations or self-centered calculations. He or she who truly loves their marriage partner loves their partner not for what they receive, but for the love itself, joyous for being able to enrich with the gift of self.
It is a faithful and exclusive love, “‘til death do us part.” That is how the spouses visualize and conceive their love, freely and aware of the matrimonial bond. Faithfulness which can sometimes prove very difficult, nobody can deny it, but it is possible, noble and deserving and that cannot be denied either.
It is finally a fruitful love, which is not exhausted in the communion of the spouses but is destined to continue in the generation of new lives. “Matrimony and conjugal love are ordained by their very nature for the procreation and upbringing of offspring. Without a doubt, children are the most excellent gift of matrimony and contribute greatly to the well-being of the parents.”
If this sounds like a fairytale to some, it might be a good time to remember that the secret of a happy marriage lies in the formation of positive habits in our children from early on, oriented to service to others.